Framers’ [sic] Market
I must tell you of a very embarrassing moment in my life. It happened in grade school, but I’m not saying which one – too embarrassing. Our class all stood around the room to compete in a spelling bee. If you committed a misspelling (careful there), you were eliminated and asked to take a seat. After the first go ‘round I was in a more comfy position than the rest of my classmates.… I can spell farmer, I really can, but I guess I rushed it.
That painful memory, however, has inspired a possible new direction for the Bob Store in 2025. Currently offering a full line of word and logic puzzles along with cogent essays and sundry commentary, the Bob Store [did you get the link?] may soon open a whole new stocked-to-the-gills department: a fresh-as-a-daisy line of merch. Get ready for the Uncle Bob United States of America Framers' [sic] Market. Product research is underway for the following roll-your-socks-up-and-down items.
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Mount Rushmore Hero Cards. Collect all five. Wait…. What?
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Hamilton sawbucks, only $12.99
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The Jefferson Bible, includes a pic of TJ with King James. A steal at twenty-two $2 bills.
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Abigail Adams High-Button Shoes. Can’t be topped!
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Henry Clay Clay Pipes. Give your favorite Whig all the smoky goodness he deserves.
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The Original Franklin Stove. A one-of-a-kind item.
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Dolly Madson [no ice] Ice Cream. Includes Dolly pin-up poster. 128 creamy drams and sweet dreams.
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The Lewis and Clark Birch Bark Canoe. Go in style!
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Original Washington Senator coins. Just one denomination available.
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The Constitution of the United Staes, in full, with Sharpie illuminations.
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The Bill of Rights, all ten. Act now; they are going fast.
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The Make America (Period) Tricorn hat. Buy wholesale and corner the market.
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The Aaron Burr Snuff Collection. ’s nuff said?
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The John Quincy Adams Eau de ‘Quince’
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The Lady Liberty Bit Coin, with Bite Mark authenticated. Also available sans bite on eBay.
If there are any infringement issues with any of the above, I’ll just run for President. So there! Nonny, nonny, nah, nah!