June 2020 Menu

Uncle Bob presents a six-pack of

All-American Limericks, Pack 4

"Three cheers for the embarassed, abashed, and slightly smutty."

 

A clever young stu out of Troy
Engineered a first date with a boy.
They rigged a kazoo
With a mouthpiece for two:
Made millions inventing this toy.

 

A yachtsman in Long Island Sound
Sailed ‘round and around and around.
He was still a bit tipsy
From a crawl in Poughkeepsie.
So a sandbar was all his boat found.

 

A bachelor farmer named Jake
Lived peacefully by River Snake
’Til one day the water
Rose more than it ought-er
And carried poor Jake to his wake.

 

A caterer just outside Fargo
Was due to deliver escargot,
But her minivan balked.
The snails could have walked
In less time than the van took that cargo.

 

A gentleman Dave from Altoona
Ran late for date with ballooner,
But he leapt, grabbed the basket
As the pilot yelled, “Blast it!”
Now Dave is much later than sooner.

 

A nun asked him out pure Platonic-ly.
He found that she drank gin and tonic-ly.
When he was near dead
She got him in bed,
And delivered a bang plate-tectonically!

June 2020 Menu

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