May 2020 Menu

Uncle Bob presents a six-pack of

All-American Limericks, Pack 3

"Three cheers for the embarassed, abashed, and slightly smutty."

 

A bouncer from South Sacramento
Had a taste for raw beef and pimiento.
’Til one day he found
Himself under the ground.
Whether meat or the heat, it was rojo.

 

The newlyweds from Pensacola
Had reason to fear the canola.
The shrimp came out fine,
The Kung-Pao divine,
But the fried ice, it splattered all over.

 

The residents of Center Ossipee
Adopted a healthy philosophy.
What? “Live Free or Die”?
Not with water nearby.
For them it’s just “Live Free and Waterski.”

 

A cox from UD, that’s in Delaware,
A true blue Blue Hen I am well aware.
The Blue Hen had a yen
To out-stroke rival Penn,
But his crew found the tempo too much to bear.

 

A pothered young John from the outskirts of Tyler, East Texas
Wore caftans and heels and his eye makeup started to vex us.
He knew he was strange;
He wished he could change,
But couldn’t decide just exactly what his kind of sex was.

 

A couple from Old Villanova
Liked to dance to a quick Bossa Nova.
They really were sweet
As they moved to the beat,
And kept on when the music was over.

May 2020 Menu

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